Goodbye to the Normals

It seems it has passed ages since last time i posted here...been happening so much things, my trip to England with my sister and my nephew, the Spiritual Connextions Awards event there, such a wonderful event, i felt so proud for being invited there :-)

i wasnt going to write here now, but was passing by here and i turned on the player ive here with the Burslem Normals song...and suddenly i felt invaded by a feeling of melancholy, really cant understand why thats happening...this song always touches me in such a weird way, dont know if its for the lyrics, or for the music, or for both...i feel something i cant explain, as if it was a huge sadness for something good thats lost forever...but what? maybe my childhood, but im not sure because it was really crap...maybe the times of my life where i only lived the present and didnt think about the past, nor about the future, nor about the "if" nor the "maybe"...does that song reminds me of good things i had and that gave me hope about people and about the world, hope about relationships, about feelings, but then everything has changed and i miss those things, because i got too much attached to them? what is it???

who are the "Normals" to whom im saying goodbye? is it me? am i saying goodbye to myself every day that passes, everyday that im getting older and older, does that mean im dying slowly every little second i live?

why am i feeling like this? i was feeling more or less ok and suddenly this song made me tears in my eyes, and made me feel confused and lost and lonely......

(hey Rob you who made this song, what feelings did you have in the moment you were composing this song? the same as im having now? the same as i always have when i listen to it?)

whats happening inside my head, inside my soul?

but its such a beautiful song, i love it so much....its very special for me, thats why i used it to give the title to my blog :-)

(and im not forgetting my Angels, the song of my life, but thats another story :-)

sweet dreams to whoever is out there wasting their time to read my silly and confused post

XXXXXXXX

im going to put here a remix i found in YouTube and i think its very good...to be honest, im not very found of remixes because when i love a song i love it as it is....but this remix has something of Jean Michel Jarre and i think the result of this work is really interesting:

«Burslem Normals ambient remix (robbie williams/nathan jay)»

My 100th post here

Its my 100th post here and i must say ive nothing special to say, so maybe i shouldnt say anything and wait for a better moment to write a post.......a special one because its my post number 100......but i needed to say an important thing, or well, not very important, but i need to say this...........

these last days ive been feeling really confused........in one side, i realise ive so great things in my life and that makes me happy........in other side, theres so much missing, i know it, im not exagerating, and that makes feel really miserable..........i feel so guilty for not enjoying the good things the way i should do.......i feel im so ungrateful and that one day, ill be punished............

yesterday, while surfing in internet, i found in google images a picture i will never forget...........it was an image of a very young child dead lying on the floor, and that child had no head, the head was lying near..............maybe one more innocent child victim of a bomb........oh my God! i felt so, so bad, i felt so guilty and silly and stupid.........me always moaning about my stupid problems and somewhere little children dying in such a cruel way!!! how is this possible??? do i deserve to have good things in my life, if i dont know how to enjoy them?

why children who have never made harm to this world, why they are suffering in this way???

is there any justice in this world?

people like me who are never satisfied with good things that they have, should take a lesson from this.........such a young child, just in the begining of their life, had no right to live, and died in such an awful way........this child had no time to dream, to smile, to laugh, to love and to be loved.........too soon this child was taken away from this world, and the only thing they met during their small life was so much pain............how we, who are still alive and who had already so many good moments in our lives, how do we feel we have the right to feel sometimes so miserable???

and then i think i should do what kids do at school to learn their lessons, and write one hundred, or maybe one thousand times, this truth:

«Dont waste your life thinking about things you dont have and suffering because of it, and enjoy good things you have, before one day you will realise that those good things may go away and then it will be too late to enjoy them...»

i wont post here that image i found in internet because its too cruel.......although i should look at it everytime i forget its lesson.............but its an image i will never forget........instead of that, i will post here a nice image, an image of hope, peace and joy to celebrate my 100th post here :-)

Feeling...

Feeling that its time to change, its time to leave so many things behind, its time to try to be another person, to try to have another life......feeling its enough of this stupid life where all the time i create problems to the ones who are closest to me......feeling everything is losing its meaning, im getting older and older and havent grown up yet and havent learnt yet how to be happy and how to make other people happy.......feeling that silly child who years ago tried to survive in the middle of tears and fears, that silly child who constantly disturbed everybody who was around her, that silly child who felt she didnt belong to this world, that silly child is still here inside my soul, and cant get rid of her, cant get rid of me.........i should make something, but i cant.........i cant........i know i should change, change everything, change all my life, i should try to be another person, sometimes im so fed up of me...........im so tired of feeling that peoples lives would be much better without me in their lives........i feel its time to go........sometimes i feel i should go away, forever......

this world is better without me, im sure of it.........

oh my God, may i die during one week and then come back again to check if my life has made some difference? to check if somebody has noticed my absence and has missed me?

im feeling so bad, bloody hell :-(

and i know i wont have that hug that im always needing so much when im feeling so bad.......

My new blog in Vox

Well, here i am again talking and talking for nobody lol

my poll closed and only two votes there......but well, at least, they were good votes so i must say the result was 100% positive lol and no i havent voted in my poll, i promise :-)

here is an image of my poor poll lol



ive now a new blog in Vox, its nothing special but its one more little corner in internet that belongs to me :-) to be honest, i had no idea of having a new blog, ive already this one and RW one too, so when ive some time or patience, i prefer to dedicate it to them :-)

but my friend Jenny McKay has a blog there and i wanted to comment it so i had to join the Vox comunity, then i noticed i could also have a blog and i didnt lose that chance..........they have there something very cool, maybe for the bloggers who dont know very well what to write about lol..........its a different question they make everydays so people can answer to it in their blogs.....they also suggest the theme for an image to post in the blogs, and i think thats a fantastic idea :-)

then i enjoyed playing around with the design of my new blog, thats always a cool thing to do, i must confess :-)

here is the banner ive made:

i hope people will enjoy reading my new blog and watching some things i post there :-)

About the fires in Greece...

"Fires are burning in more than half the country," said fire department spokesman Nikos Diamandis. "This is definitely an unprecedented disaster for Greece."

How is this possible??? we are in the 21th century and there has been such a development in technology, in science, and we still have such awful things like these fires in Greece??? half of the country burning, almost 70 people died because of them, houses, farms and lands destroyed, how is this possible??? a lady saw the flames approaching her house and she ran away from them with her 4 children........but the house didnt burn and she was found later very far away, burned to death and hugging her dead children........people said that if she hadnt run away from her house, she and her children would be still alive now............nooooooooooooo!!! i cant accept this!!!

i dont believe the governors of that country are not able to fight agaisnt this disaster, sorry but i cant believe..........PLEASE DO SOMETHING!!!! I BELIEVE YOU CAN FINISH WITH ALL THESE AWFUL FIRES!!!

i only can send to all greeks my positive thoughts and my prays........and i wish that very soon peace will be back to such a beautiful country......


smoke in Greece :-(

To give and to receive

I havent written here for ages, well at least it looks like that lol :-)

im happy because i had here in my poll my first vote and a positive vote! not many days left to vote and only one vote but at least its a good vote :-) (and i promise it wasnt me voting there) so thanks so much to the one who voted in my poll and who enjoys my blog and a big hug to that nice person, whoever they are :-)

then i wanted to ask a question but i think theres no answer for it.....

why in this world there are so many people who think that all nice things somebody makes are made with the intention of receiving something in return? why people dont believe that there are some people, there are some occasions, when a nice attitude doesnt need anything in return, or maybe only a smile and a bit of joy?

kids are wise, even animals are wise........they are nice to us only to receive a hug, a smile, a nice word.........or they are nice to us simply because they want to be nice, they enjoy being nice :-)

why we the adults, we are so complicated? why we receive a nice thing and the first thing we think is: why are they making this to me? which are their intentions? are they thinking i must pay this back, but how? maybe its better to refuse this offer.....maybe its better not accept nice things from this person because ive nothing to give back or maybe they will ask for things i dont want to give.........

and then i think why this world is so sad.......because people dont accept simple and nice things and gestures, people are afraid of them........and if they dont accept those things, they also refuse to make simple and nice things to the others........for them, its easy to buy and sell, they see the money come, they see the money go, and that doesnt scare them........but if, instead of money, theres a relationship, there are feelings, people simply run away from them.......they need to see whats behind an attitude, whats behind a little present.........but those things arent visible to the eye, they are only visible to the heart.......and people dont like things that are not visible to the eye, maybe because they are insecure.......or maybe because they are afraid of believing in the bright side of life..........they are afraid of believing in the good side of everybody.........

its so nice to give.....since very young i always loved to give, and sometimes i wished i was very rich so i could give special presents to all special people in my life.........and i must say that everytime i give a present to somebody, the only thing i want in return is their joy of having that present :-) i think thats more than enough, and that makes me so happy too.......

but sadly this world has so many mean people, who are so cruel and selfish, thats not very easy to believe in good actions and in good words, isnt it?

but sometimes we should give a try, i think :-)

Forever Young

I was in my 20s when i listened to this song and i always loved it so much...........more than 20 years passed by and i keep loving it as the first time i listened to it........Forever Young..........beauty is always young, isnt it? good things are always good, even when the time passes.............this song and this video always touched my heart, really dont know why........or maybe because it talks about a dream of every human being, the dream of being eternally young, the dream of living forever...............the last bit, when the trumpet plays, is my favorite one, i always put the music louder in that bit and i always ask people around me to let me listen to it :-)

its funny how so much time has passed and my heart has the same feelings that had more than 20 years ago........oh my God, i wish so much i was 20 again!..........but i didnt want to go back in past, not at all..............i remember that time my life was really hard, i had very bad moments, mainly because of my father.......maybe one of the best things i had in those times was the music..........i loved the music of the 80s, i was so much time listening to it, specially the english pop and rock...............it was a golden era of the music, many people say it and i agree with them..........even today i keep loving so many songs of those times........ :-)

yeah, it would be so great if i was young again, young forever.........life would be so much better, im sure............so many chances i lost when i was young, because of my life, i could have them again..............so many things that keep hurting me today, maybe would disappear.........so many wounds the past gave to my heart, maybe could be fixed now...........only because i would be young again, and i would have new chances now to start everything again............

but, its only a dream, isnt it?

as the song says: Its so hard to get old without a cause/I dont want to perish like a fading horse
.............

here is this beautiful video, and the beautiful lyrics of this wonderful song:



Forever Young
(Alphaville)

Lets dance in style, lets dance for a while
Heaven can wait were only watching the skies
Hoping for the best but expecting the worst
Are you going to drop the bomb or not?

Let us die young or let us live forever
We dont have the power but we never say never
Sitting in a sandpit, life is a short trip
The musics for the sad men

Can you imagine when this race is won
Turn our golden faces into the sun
Praising our leaders were getting in tune
The musics played by the madmen

Forever young, I want to be forever young
Do you really want to live forever, forever and ever

Some are like water, some are like the heat
Some are a melody and some are the beat
Sooner or later they all will be gone
Why dont they stay young

Its so hard to get old without a cause
I dont want to perish like a fading horse
Youth is like diamonds in the sun
And diamonds are forever

So many adventures couldnt happen today
So many songs we forgot to play
So many dreams are swinging out of the blue
We let them come true