More thoughts for today

Create Continuously
Every day is an opportunity to be creative - the canvas is your mind, the brushes and colours are your thoughts and feelings, the panorama is your story, the complete picture is a work of art called, 'my life'. Be careful what you put on the canvas of your mind today - it matters.



Truth
To follow someone else's truth is a trap. The best strategy is to know your own truth, face it and live by it. Others may inspire, guide, give you directions, but ultimately you have to cut your own way through the jungle. You could always be asking others where North is, and they will tell you. Someone will say North is this way and someone else that North is that other way - and both would have been sincere. But you alone has to find your true North.



Judge Not
At times you may feel yourself to be the victim of other people's bitterness, ignorance, smallness or insecurities. Try not to judge them - things aren't always what they seem. And it could be worse. You could be them!



Truth
There is no need to prove the truth. Truth is such a sun that it cannot remain hidden. No matter how many walls come in front of it, the light of the truth cannot remain hidden.



Near Contentment
When you can think of yesterday without regret and tomorrow without fear, you are near contentment.



Learn A Lesson
Instead of being afraid in a delicate situation, learn a lesson from it and make yourself strong.

Home is where the hurt is....

Its funny because i need to talk but i really dont know what to say......usually when i feel a bit down or lost i come here and i talk about my feelings and then i feel a bit better........even knowing that nobody will answer to me lol.........

its not nice to have arguements with the ones we love, but the closer we are to somebody, the more we hurt them and the more they hurt us..........i have already talked about this here once..........and ive said that this isnt fair........as Robbie Williams said in his lyrics of Spread Your Wings "Home is where the hurt is"...........that means that to love means to suffer............

happily, when people really love us, those bad moments pass quickly and all tears we have cried soon get dry.........love is the disease but love is also the cure :-)

i was feeling today really miserable and sometimes i think i exagerated because there was no reason to feel the way i was feeling.........but in those moments the first memories that come to my head is those past moments when i was still a child and very often all my little world around me was against me and rejected me...........and i felt that nobody loved me and that i didnt belong to this world..........those ghosts never leave me in peace, i know it..........and they attack me when i feel more fragile :-(

sometimes i feel that life is a punishement.........everything wrong we make in the past we will pay for it sooner or later.......things we regret, things we know we shouldnt have never made, we know that we will be punished for them..........and when our life gets a bit difficult, we know, its our past errors that are still there, even if we dont want to.........

always the ghosts from the past, isnt it?

people are not perfect and are always making mistakes........some with not much importance, others really bad...........and we keep regreting them all our lives.........and once again i remember Robs lyrics in his wonderful song No Regrets "No regrets / they don't work / No regrets / they only hurt"

well, ive already talked a bit about what im feeling now............i think that the next time that i will read this post i will realise how silly and not logical are my words and my thoughts lol..........but maybe now im feeling a bit better.........im not sure..........

:-)

I know that nobody comes here to read my posts, but i need to say that today im feeling better thanks God :-)

yesterday night i was feeling really weird, not only physically but also psychologically, cant understand what was happening with me.........i took a pain killer and then i went to bed......sadly my night wasnt very good because i was all night awakening, but during the day i slept a bit, then i took my coffee, and after that, slower and slower, i was fine again..........

in my blog yesterday i know ive said some silly things that maybe i shouldnt have said...........but the fact is that sometimes there are so dark clouds inside my heart that some things i simply cant see very well :-/ and in those moments im always afraid that some great things i have in my life, doesnt exist...........im afraid that im not loved by the ones i love........im afraid that the ones i care about, dont really care about me..............but those dark clouds dont let me see some good and bright things that i should never forget...........

i wish so much i never had those awful dark clouds in my heart, because they always make me feel so bad............

:-(

Im feeling so weird, something strange inside me......im feeling cold, my body hurting as if somebody had punched me :-( i feel as if i had fiever, its so strange.......my head so heavy.........my throat hurting...........sometimes ive these feelings and then i go to bed and the next day im fine again.....but im feeling sad inside my heart too, i needed to tell something here in my blog before i explode.......i feel as if im being punished for something bad ive made.......i needed to cry but i dont want to, im so tired of crying..........sometimes im so tired of everything...........i need to look after my cats, i love them so much, i know they would feel so sad and lost if i went away..............who would take care of them? who would talk to them as i do? im so coward, always looking for excuses to not make what i should make.............and my family? they love me but soon they would get used to my absence..........but maybe they are the only human beings on earth who really love me and who really would miss me...........and i love them so much.............4 people without whom i couldnt live.....................what about my friends? do i have friends??? whats a friend??? friends love to meet friends, love to be with them.......friends dont treat friends as if they felt repugnance for them...............whats a friend by the way??? dont know whats that, to be honest...........so many times ive the feeling ive great friends, beautiful actions and words that make me think "hey im special for this person :-) "..........and thats so great, so wonderful, as if the sky had always plenty of shining stars in the darkest night...........and it makes me feel happy, it makes me feel life is worth it...........but suddenly strange things happen and i feel i was wrong............i feel as if i was a 3 years old child who only created imaginary friends to fight against their loneliness............

oh my God, im feeling so bad........

i needed to talk, only that.....

sorry...........

maybe tomorrow i will feel better.........

:-(

More thoughts for today

I keep receiving everydays in my email box the thoughts of the day and ive chosed some to post here in my blog :-)
here they are:

Grain Of Sand
It is not the mountains ahead that wear you out. It's the grain of sand in your shoe.



Silence Is Gold
If speech is silver, silence is gold. When you must speak, speak a few words, speak sweetly and softly. That is the way to reach a listener's heart.



Full Of Peace
Stay full of peace yourself and know that this peace will reach your loved ones and ultimately the whole world.



Anger
Anger is an acid that does more harm to the vessel in which it is stored rather than to the person on whom it is poured.



Self Respect
Rather than be concerned with what others think of you, concern yourself with what you think of yourself. The greatest fortune is to know who you are and who you need not to be.



Plain Sailing
The wind may blow from any direction, but the direction in which you go depends on how you set your sails.



Inner Beauty
"Wow...that's beautiful!" Is either a cry or a thought when faced with the mountain sunset, a spectacular view or a well formed man or woman. But where is the beauty, where is the appreciation of beauty, where is the ability to discern beauty? It is within our own consciousness. For the essence of who and what we are is beauty itself. The essence of beauty is not found in the body, a face or a mountain - they only stir the essence of beauty within our own spirit. And that beauty is not only something we taste within ourselves, but it emerges in our character as virtue, and in our life as care. For what is virtue, but love in action. The next time you say, "That's beautiful!" know that you speak of yourself, and it is you who are beautiful. Always were, always will be.



Be Good
Do not try to be great, try to be good, for being good is great.



Radiate Happiness
Have you ever noticed that happiness is not a dependency, it is a decision? You don't actually need anything to be happy. It's not something that comes from outside, it comes from inside, and when you radiate a happy energy you'll be amazed what it attracts into your life. Don't worry, be happy...sound familiar? Decide now, be happy, and watch magic begin to enter your life.



Failure
Failure doesn't mean - God has abandoned you. It means - God has a better way for you.



Eternal Star
There is a part of you that is perfect and pure. It is untouched by the less-than-perfect characteristics you have acquired by living in a less than perfect world. This part of you is a still and eternal star. Make time to reach it and this will bring you untold benefit.

An Angel

Today, its Childrens Day here in Portugal........dont know if in other countries this day has the same meaning.......well, im dedicating my post to one of my sisters who maybe its the best friend, among my family, ive ever had since i was born.........Céu (that here in Portugal means at the same time Sky and Heaven) is not only a great sister but also a great person.........she was always a very nice little girl, always with a charming smile in her face, very clever, a great student, and she always had a great sense of justice............and she has not changed, all these years :-)

i remembered to talk about her in Childrens Day because since she was very young she loved children and she read lots of books about education and she always cared about childrens problems........and she had a dream and fought for it, and a few years ago she made her dream come true, creating an association dedicated to children in need, who live in very difficult situations in their families................thanks God she found a few people who helped her in her dream and till today they have already helped many kids and have given many good moments to lots of kids who, without them, would have a very sad and dark life..........

that association is called Meninos de Oiro that means Golden Children........in fact, for my sister, all children are more precious than gold and shes happy for being able to help them and to give to them all the love she has in her heart.........and i think thats so wonderful

she also loves photography........since very young i always remember her taking a camera to wherever she goes, taking pictures to everything, specially to children........and her pictures are so special, maybe because she puts in the images the beautiful heart she has

i admire her and im also very grateful to her because in a very difficult moment of my childhood, she was the only person who was able to give me her hand, although she was only a little kid like me..............i will never forget that............my dad forcing me to eat and i didnt want, i cried, i vomited, every days it was the same thing, nobody knew what to do, and my sister, still a kid, told my dad "i will take care of her for now on"........and she did..........the meals that were a nightmare to me, became nice moments because my sister was there looking after me, she didnt oblige me to eat, she was patient with me, and i was no more scared........silly adults didnt find the solution that was so simple that only a child found it..............


my sister and me (4 and 3 years old)

so, im grateful to her, for this, for one day that i was going to cross a street and a car was very near and i didnt see it, and it was her who saved me for being caught by the car.........im grateful for one day when i was at home eating a candy and suddenly i couldnt breath and i didnt know what to do, and it was my sister again who saved me from dying suffocated by the candy............im grateful for every moment she has helped me with her advices and with her understanding when i feel sad or lost, for every moment she forgives me for my weaknesses...........

i made one day a little film dedicated to her.....i called it An Angel...........and the images there are pictures that were taken by her...............i put the video in YouTube and then i showed to her and she loved it :-).........but i know thats not enough, she deserves more, because she has always been kind of a guardian angel to me and i feel happy for the day i decided to live with her and with my dear 12 years old nephew :-)

im going to put here the video that i made for her and before going now i want to wish to her all the happiness of the world and that all her dreams will come true..........God bless my sister and thanks again for everything :-)